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There has been a noticeable pause since my last offering and in some ways it has been deliberate - in others, necessary.
I know I’m not alone in this, and it can be best summed up by a post a friend shared on social media this week - these are not her words and no attribution was given. Should anyone have this, do let me know so I may honour the writer:
A gentle reminder about why you are utterly exhausted…
No one I know began this year on a full tank. Given the vicious onslaught of the previous two years (let’s just call it what it was) most of us dragged ourselves across the finish line of 2021… frazzled, spent, running on aged adrenaline fumes…
We crawled into 2022 still carrying shock, trauma, grief, heaviness, disbelief… The memories of a surreal existence…
And then it began… The fastest hurricane year we could ever have imagined. Whether we have consciously processed it or not, this has been a year of more pressure, more stress, and a race to “catch up” in all departments…
Every. Single. One.
Work, school, sports, relationships, life…
Though not intentionally aware, perhaps hopeful that the busier we are, the more readily we will forget… the more easily we will undo the emotional tangle… the more permanently we will wipe away the scarring wounds…
We can’t.
And attempts to re-create some semblance of “normal” on steroids while disregarding that for almost two years our sympathetic nervous systems were on full alert, has left our collective mental health in tatters. Our children and teens are not exempt. The natural byproduct of fighting a hurricane is complete and utter exhaustion…
So before you begin questioning the absolutely depleted and wrung-dry state you are in- Pause. Breathe. Remind yourself of who you are and what you have endured. And then remind yourself of what you have overcome.
Despite it all, you’re still going. (Even on the days you stumble and find yourself face down in a pile of dirt).
Understanding brings compassion…
Most of the world’s citizens are in need of a little extra TLC at the moment. Most are donning invisible “Handle with care” posters around their necks and “Fragile” tattoos on their bodies…
Instead of racing to the finish line of this year, tread gently. Go slowly.
Amidst the chaos, find small pockets of silence. Find compassion. Allow the healing. And most of all… Be kind. There’s no human being on earth who couldn’t use just a little bit more of the healing salve of kindness
‘Amidst the chaos, find small pockets of silence’ - and this is what I managed recently, though it took much to make it happen. I had eight days silent retreat, alone, at the end of November. Let’s be very clear, retreat did not mean a fully catered, luxury resort somewhere sunny. It was me, my caravan, with the best of UK weather (!) Yes, the land I was on flooded overnight day 3 and I had to be relocated, yet this was quickly absorbed into appreciating all the gifts that can be realised from challenges when you have a semblance of feeling resourced.
I set no agenda, other than to respond to what was needed in any given moment as it arose. There was beauty in solitary treks, tears that flowed from hours of endless writing resulting in healing a deep ancestral wound, meditation, sleep, reading, simple and wholesome food planned in advance. Each day was rinse and repeat.
Also, discovering the beauty and benefit of hats not only for warmth, but to be relieved from having to appear kempt in some way shape or form was liberating!
The above was taken on a hike one morning - visibility was reduced and reminded me that we don’t always see what’s present, as elements are often obscured or clouded by our thoughts and stories we attach along the way. An aspect we encounter regularly during our meditation practice too.
Pause to feel the little Joys of life.
Pause to reflect on the learnings they imbibe.
For these Pauses are the ones that fulfill your life. [Drishti Bablani]
When was the last time you paused for any length of time?
I appreciate having any length of time away isn’t something that’s available to many of us, and I am eternally grateful for the opportunity, as well as the support of others in making it possible.
Recently I have been curating an online retreat for Winter Solstice on Wednesday 21 December - 20% of proceeds will go to Afrori Books in Brighton
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This is an evening of deep contemplation - all you need to ‘do’ is ‘be’. You will be taken on a journey of music, poetry, story, silence, reflection, with a backdrop of stunning imagery (should you wish to open your eyes at any point!)
An invitation to stoke your inner fire - creating a small cave of blankets, cushions and candlelight. Bring yourself, a hot drink or a tipple that warms. You may be inclined to journal at points, or as the offering unfolds as winter is doing now, you may simply wish to allow it to flow.
The session is 90 minutes and you may book your place with other women here
Last Sunday saw the final offering of 2022 with Meet the Mirror group. We have covered so much ground since the first gathering in May. Generally there’s a theme we unpack through discussion, writing, visualisation / meditation / somatic practices.
The group has been closed to allow women to connect and create a safe container in which to share, however it will be open for January for anyone wishing to join us to discover more and journey with us. The group will then be closed until later in 2023.
Curious to know more? Here’s what some of the women are saying…
This circle [Meet the Mirror] is my bi-monthly dose of Bliss. It is a real sacred space in which you can fully immerse in thought-provoking, beautiful, transformative experiences that Claire offers. Shared with a group of wonderful wise women, Claire expertly holds and guides us with wisdom and Grace. I feel blessed to be part of this. Thank you Claire. [Dawn Rosser]
Claire has an extraordinary gift for facilitating group work. This beautiful group consists of peri-menopausal women going through a wide diversity of transitions. Claire guides us through delicious meditations, writing and reflections...but the truly powerful "in the mirror" magic happens when we share. That's when we see much more of ourselves- through each other. For me these bi-monthly encounters have become an oasis in which I can comfortably express my deepest feelings knowing that I am unconditionally supported by other women. [Nicole Prado - Madrid, Spain]
Meet the Mirror has really helped me to get in touch with some of the deeper parts of myself, and has come out in my writing. I am always fascinated by the synchronicity of the work with life at the time. The bringing together of like minded womxn has been a beautiful thing for me to experience. Claire is a great and gentle facilitator and mentor - thank you [CC]
Silver Birch from project ‘Sip the Soft Silver’ - copyright Claire Murphy 2019
Candlelight copyright fernhazel.photography on IG